Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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