I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
