My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Drunk is a universal language darling
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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