I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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