I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize