Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
