I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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