What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize