I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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