So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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