Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
