Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
