I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
vagina is talking i cant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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