I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
