The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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