Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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