I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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