it's too hot outside to masturbate.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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