that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
