His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
