He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
