i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize