She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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