Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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