You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize