I want to have your abortion
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
