Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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