You're a womanizer and a bitch.
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
