it's like iHOP with fire
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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