Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
