I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize