I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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