I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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