Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
The air was thick with penises
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I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.