Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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