Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.

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  (646): Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself. http://tfl.nu/w0yt
  Replies (20) Good night (6912) Bad night (756)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?

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  (540): i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic? http://tfl.nu/pwuf
  Replies (50) Good night (4603) Bad night (753)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money

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  (570): I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money http://tfl.nu/ayme
  Replies (40) Good night (4273) Bad night (939)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it

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  (404): we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it http://tfl.nu/n2gi
  Replies (31) Good night (1067) Bad night (8974)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.

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  (480): I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly. http://tfl.nu/a7gl
  Replies (10) Good night (3628) Bad night (1457)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.

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  (630): There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am. http://tfl.nu/bakg
  Replies (19) Good night (1573) Bad night (2516)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.

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  (952): It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix. http://tfl.nu/eau6
  Replies (3) Good night (648) Bad night (1137)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?

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  (817): How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf? http://tfl.nu/6kzv
  Replies (6) Good night (1382) Bad night (596)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina

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  (407): So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina http://tfl.nu/bjxi
  Replies (22) Good night (915) Bad night (2253)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.

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  (603): The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon. http://tfl.nu/hw0j
  Replies (4) Good night (974) Bad night (498)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?

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  (336): It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo? http://tfl.nu/6rh5
  Replies (7) Good night (1394) Bad night (545)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.

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  (609): I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack. http://tfl.nu/ai2z
  Replies (1) Good night (1363) Bad night (341)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?

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  (704): I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class? http://tfl.nu/l30v
  Replies (2) Good night (659) Bad night (328)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.

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  (843): I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea. http://tfl.nu/jdvw
  Replies (1) Good night (346) Bad night (536)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.

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  (919): we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise. http://tfl.nu/z0vg
  Replies (2) Good night (600) Bad night (205)

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