yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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