I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
