Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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