Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
