at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize
