ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
