i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
