? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
