Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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