When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
