I am puke
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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