He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
