well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize