is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
