I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.