You just made me feel so damn special
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
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