But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza