what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I have tasted many bathrooms
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
